Afua Hagan is a contributor to CTVNews.ca, focusing on the Royal Family. Based in London and Accra, Hagan is a regular commentator on the royals across a variety of international outlets, and is a leading voice on diversity in Britain. LONDON -- There was something wonderfully familiar about the scenes in Nottingham on Thursday. Prince Harry and Meghan, the Duke and Duchess of Sussex, stepped out of their car to cheers, flowers, hugs and a steady stream of selfie requests. Children waved. Well-wishers called out their support. And the couple looked relaxed, happy and very much at home. “It’s great to be back,” Harry said. For a moment, it could have been 2017 all over again. Nottingham, after all, is where it began. It was the setting for Harry and Meghan’s first official joint appearance after their engagement, almost nine years ago. They were the bright new faces of a modernizing monarchy, welcomed by big crowds and an enormous wave of public goodwill. Their place in the Royal Family looked secure. It’s now October 2026, and the picture could hardly be more different. After six years in the United States, Harry and Meghan are back in Britain for an extended stay, with Archie, seven, and Lilibet, five, settled into a private home and British schools. They’ve closed the physical distance to the Royal Family. The emotional distance is proving much harder to cross. And I’d argue that’s not entirely their doing. Meghan and Harry representing themselves Thursday’s visit was the couple’s first joint outing since returning in August, taking in three Nottingham charities. The emotional high point came at Himmah, where Meghan was reunited with the women of the Hubb Community Kitchen, whom she worked with after Grenfell. They’ve reportedly stayed in touch ever since she left Britain. About 100 well-wishers greeted the couple with flowers and hugs. It was a far smaller crowd than on their first Nottingham visit, and one warm welcome doesn’t prove Britain’s divided opinion has shifted. It hasn’t. But the warmth was impossible to miss. These engagements looked like traditional royal duties, with the planned visits, charity meetings, crowds and cameras. Yet Harry and Meghan were representing only themselves. A letter authorized by King Charles in September restated that they remain non-working royals, and that their charitable work is private, not done on behalf of the Crown. Frankly, Nottingham offered a glimpse of the independent public life they hoped to build in 2020, and judging by Thursday’s evidence, they’re rather good at it. The harder question is whether that independence can sit alongside a real relationship with the family they left behind. A family reunion that remains out of reach The latest reporting about Christmas says a lot about how complicated things still are. Even though they are based in Britain for now, Harry and Meghan are reportedly planning to spend the festive season with Meghan’s mother, Doria Ragland, rather than joining the Royal Family at Sandringham. People magazine reports that the couple intend to celebrate with Doria, possibly in California. The Sunday Times, meanwhile, quotes a source suggesting the Sussexes don’t expect an invitation to the royal gathering. Buckingham Palace hasn’t said whether one was offered or held back. Harry and Meghan last spent Christmas at Sandringham in 2018. Until now, the Atlantic explained their absence. This year, distance is no longer the excuse, which I suspect is why the story has such legs. Christmas is a private occasion, and choosing to be with Doria shouldn’t automatically be read as a snub. But the Christmas Day walk to church is one of the monarchy’s most recognizable displays of unity. Harry, Meghan, William and Catherine appearing together would raise hopes of a reconciliation that may not be there yet. If there’s no invitation, my guess is it’s less about the turkey and more about the photograph. A father, a son and an unhealed brotherly rift There are gentle signs of progress between Harry and his father. In July, King Charles and Queen Camilla welcomed Harry, Meghan, Archie and Lilibet to Highgrove, the first time the King had seen his grandchildren in person for several years. The two men are reportedly in touch by phone, though there’s been no confirmed meeting since the Sussexes moved back in August. I’d go further: this is the one relationship that could be repaired quickly, if both men wanted it enough. Prince William is quite another matter. The brothers remain estranged, with deep grievances on both sides. Harry has said many times that he wants to reconcile, while William has given no public sign that he’s ready. For William, it may be as much about trust as forgiveness, and for Harry, it may depend on acknowledgement of how he feels he was treated. As the future King, William can’t treat this as a purely private matter. I don’t believe he can ascend to the throne as King William with this feud hanging over him. So why isn’t the King making the first move? This is the question I keep coming back to. Harry has been the one saying he wants peace, loudly and often, yet the people who could do the most to build a bridge have left him to walk across it alone. Why? I think there are five reasons, and some are more defensible than others. The first is institutional habit. The monarchy isn’t built to chase anyone. Its instinct is to stay calm and let time do the work. “Never complain, never explain” is as much a survival strategy as a motto, and reaching out publicly would feel like an admission that something went wrong. The second, and I’d argue the most legitimate, is trust. Harry and Meghan have spoken openly about private conversations in a memoir, a documentary and interviews, so anyone in the family must now assume a private word could become a public story. Overtures need a safe place to land, and the family may not believe there is one. The third is the Palace’s own line in the sand. September’s letter was careful and deliberate, and a warm statement or visible invitation would blur it. The working royals take their cues from the King and William, and nobody below them will step over a boundary the institution has drawn. The fourth is William. As the future King, he has his children, his wife and a stable succession to protect, and reconciling with a brother who has publicly criticized the family is a real risk. I understand that, but understanding isn’t agreeing. Caution is a reasonable response to a wound. It’s less reasonable as permanent policy. And finally, there’s pride. Both sides feel wronged, and both are waiting for the other to blink. I don’t think anyone is the villain, but a standoff is still a standoff. Here’s my view. Harry has done a lot of talking, and some of it has made the road harder. But he’s also the one who has come home with his children and shown up. The King is the head of the family as well as the head of state, so that responsibility doesn’t sit with Harry alone. Waiting for the other person to move first is understandable. It isn’t leadership. What about Archie and Lilibet? For me, the most poignant part of the Sussexes’ return is the children. For now, Archie and Lilibet are at school here and much closer to their grandfather, but living nearby doesn’t automatically bring people close. Will they form real bonds with King Charles, their uncle William, and their cousins George, Charlotte and Louis? They’ve had no part in the quarrels between the adults, yet their family ties may depend on whether those quarrels are settled, which strikes me as deeply unfair. A quiet afternoon with their grandfather could be worth far more than a very public Christmas at Sandringham, but either way it will take time, effort and a willingness from the grown-ups to move beyond the past. Right now, it’s hard to say who’s going to go first. Coming home not the same as being welcomed back For Harry and Meghan, Nottingham was an important milestone. They went back to a city that means a great deal to their story, and reconnected with organizations and people they’d supported as working royals. The day showed that they can still draw a crowd, win over supporters and contribute to British charitable life without Buckingham Palace behind them. Their future here may be defined by that independence, not by any return to royal duties. Indeed, there’s no sign that either of them wants to take up a formal role in the monarchy again, and honestly, I’m not sure they should. But the bigger questions are still hanging in the air. Can Harry repair things with his father while he’s still estranged from his brother? Can Archie and Lilibet build meaningful connections with their royal relatives? Nearly nine years ago, Nottingham marked the start of Harry and Meghan’s royal journey. This week’s visit may mark the start of something entirely different. They’ve found their way back to Britain. Whether they can find their way back into the Royal Family is a far more complicated question, and one the family can’t leave Harry to answer alone. Because coming home and being welcomed back are two very different things.
