A Saskatchewan author is hoping to spark honest conversations about motherhood through her newly released book. Yorkton mother Shannon Erickson shared her story and struggles in Tammy Powder’s new book ‘Mamas Need Love and Compassion Too,’ which explores the challenges many mothers face every day, including isolation, self-doubt and mental health struggles - something Erickson knows all too well. “Often we’re carrying that heaviness on our own, not feeling able to really share some of those challenges with others,” Erickson said. Erickson says she entered motherhood with what she called realistic expectations, but wasn’t prepared for how isolating the experience could be. “I was scared. I knew I wanted this child and I knew that it would be good. But I didn’t know how to parent at that point,” she recalled. She remembers spending long days at home with her baby, unsure where to turn for conversation as a new mother. “It’s often easy to be isolated and really not know who to reach out to when you are struggling.” Those experiences are echoed in the stories collected by Powder, herself a Saskatchewan mother. She says her own struggles after giving birth inspired her to start conversations about the realities many women face behind closed doors. “We put it on ourselves that we should be able to do it all, plus smiling, plus looking good, and all of this stuff,” Powder said. She believes mothers need more opportunities to openly discuss those challenges. “I think that we need to have more conversations about saying that it’s okay to have a bad day. It’s okay to not feel like we’re doing well.” Her book is a collection of stories from Canadian mothers aimed at breaking down unrealistic expectations surrounding motherhood, and encouraging women to seek support. “You get on these darn phones and social media and you see that everyone else has it together. Well, that just makes you isolate more.” She says social media is only part of the problem though. According to Angela Van Den Heuvel, executive director of Bring2Life Creative Counselling in Yorkton, physical isolation can also make it difficult for mothers to connect with others. “It’s hard to get away from a routine. Maybe there are a lot of naps that need to happen. Maybe you have a lot of kids in the house, and it’s just difficult to get away from the house,” she said. Van Den Heuvel said roughly 90 per cent of the mothers her organization works with struggle with some form of isolation. She says certain groups face even greater barriers. “There is a surprising number of mothers in Yorkton that don’t have access to transportation. That’s another issue that I see regularly,” she said. Financial challenges can further limit access to support networks and community programs. “People that make less money have fewer resources to go and join women’s groups and motherhood groups. They’re often the people that tend to have more kids.” Bring2Life operates a mobile counselling unit that covers a 150-kilometre area around Yorkton, which is now working to create a dedicated support group for women dealing with isolation. A major goal is ensuring mothers can access childcare while participating. “We’re trying to get funds to get the childcare that women would need, so that women could just have their own space, and their kids could also have a safe place to play,” Van Den Heuvel said. She adds help can begin at home. “What you want for your wife is for her to feel like she is more than just a mother. That is the biggest thing,” Van Den Heuvel advised. “Because when we lose ourselves in motherhood, it can become our entire identity. And if your wife is struggling with isolation, the biggest thing you can do and the most effective thing you can do is allow her to find herself again who she is outside of motherhood.” Van Den Heuvel noted that, while not specific to fatherhood, her firm offers a support group for men as well. “We try to focus on hobbies so that men can come together, connect, and create a bit of a village of their own.” For Erickson, Powder and Van Den Heuvel, the message is simple - motherhood can be difficult, and mothers should not feel pressured to face those challenges alone. They hope by sharing stories and creating spaces for connection, more women will understand support is available.
